THIS WEEK'S DEAR JOHN LETTER!
I heard you ask for funny letters a few weeks ago. Not sure how funny this is, but I'm sure some people will be amused. I have a neighbor who has three cats. They are all outdoor cats. So we also kind of have three cats. Sadly, I'm allergic to cats, so I try to keep them out of my yard. Last week I carried in groceries and left my kitchen door open. Somehow one of their cats came in while I was not looking. That night I was all stuffy and puffy. I had no idea the cat was in my house, but while I was watching a movie with my husband, the cat jumped on my lap. I screamed like crazy! My husband caught the cat and put it outside. He found it pretty amusing, but I'm not happy at all. When we had dogs, we needed to keep them inside or on a leash. Why is it OK for cats to roam ll over the neighborhood? How do I keep these cats out of my yard and out of my house? Nothing violent please.
Signed – I Don't Like Cats
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IS A SPECIAL DAY! (A special thanks to NationalDayCalendar.com)
National Go Fishing Day
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A new study by the Guinness Book has determined that the world’s tallest dog, a seven foot Great Dane named “Freddy,” is now the world’s oldest living Great Dane at the age of eight. (https://bit.ly/3fsXq0J)
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Each day we share stories about people doing dumb things under the influence, but ADDICTION IS NO LAUGHING MATTER! If you or someone you know needs help, we're here! Learn more at TimeForRehab.com.
A Monroe, Louisiana man is facing a disturbing the peace drunkenness charge after he was allegedly naked in a West Monroe gas station. According to an arrest report for 29-year-old Jesse Dearman Jr., WMPD officers were dispatched regarding a naked man inside the store. When officers arrived, deputies had the man in custody. He identified himself as Jesse Dearman and said he was naked because he was attacked by a spider and removed his clothes for safety. Officers said they asked Dearman if he had taken any controlled dangerous substances. Dearman replied he had but did not know what it was. On a scale of 1-10 ranking its power, he said the CDS was a four. Dearman was booked into OCC Thursday morning on the disturbing the peace charge and one municipal charge in West Monroe. The suspect has posted bond. (https://bit.ly/2UfDuWQ)
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The Texas Prison where Joe Exotic is staying has denied reports that they’re keeping fan mail from the “Tiger King.” (https://bit.ly/2MZ9eM5)
Pete Davidson’s new film, “The King Of Staten Island,” was mysteriously pulled from drive-in-theaters. (https://bit.ly/2C7dQgR)
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Spain’s Bullfighters are seeking a bailout from the government after many of the bulls were sent to slaughterhouses. (https://bit.ly/2UJHA9R)
International Health Experts are questioning how Russia could still have such incredibly low Coronavirus totals. Three different Doctors have slipped and fell out of a hospital window after claiming the government didn’t have enough supplies. (https://abcn.ws/2UJe5VG)
A Belgian Prince got Coronavirus after breaking quarantine to party in Spain. (https://bit.ly/37jfbg6)
British Prime Minister Boris Johnson is allowing people who don’t live together to have sex for the first time since the Coronavirus lockdowns. (https://bit.ly/37neYZp)
India has increased the penalty for killing a cow to ten years in jail. (https://bit.ly/2UDSaiS)
Rihanna is paying $415,000 to stay in The Hamptons for one month this summer. (https://bit.ly/2YoiFKd)
Kanye West and Kim Kardashian have sold a Soho Loft they bought in 2018. The apartment went for $5 million. (https://bit.ly/2YtUNF1)
FUN FACT FOR YOU:
Share this with your friends... they'll think you're really smart!
Beaver bum goo is occasionally used to enhance vanilla flavorings. The next time you eat something that flaunts the rich flavor of vanilla, you might want to be aware of—or do your best to ignore—the fact that castoreum, a goo that beavers excrete to mark their territory, is sometimes used to enhance the flavor of vanilla in food, according to National Geographic. The goo is "generally regarded as a safe additive" by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, but you'll probably never come across it in real life because it's difficult and expensive to collect.
A NEWS HEADLINE... FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS WORLD!
A video of a cat getting “brain freeze” after it tried ice cream for the first time in Quebec has gone viral. (http://dailym.ai/2YmoDuT)
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authorities say three kids broke into a school and trashed the
building, leaving more than $50,000 in damages. Police said Monday
the children, ages 6, 8, and 12, broke a glass door to gain access to
Altus Intermediate School for the vandalism spree. “Surveillance
cameras inside the school show the juveniles damaging computers,
dumping paint on floors and walls, using fire extinguishers inside
multiple rooms and damaging interior doors and interior windows,”
the Altus Police Department said. Photos released of the damages
showed red and blue paint splattered throughout the building with
numerous objects knocked to the floor. The youngsters were arrested
Sunday in connection with the burglary and later released to their
MOMENT OF DUH: Brought to you by InsuranceChicken.com
Florida court records show that a fight over directional arrows on the floor of a Goodwill store ended with a pair of shoppers under arrest for battery. 29-year-old Jenna Sims was inside the Tampa-area thrift store when she got into a confrontation with 50-year-old Paul Turner “over the floor directions due to COVID-19.” As part of Goodwill Industries’ Coronavirus safety measures, one-way aisles have been established to allow patrons to more easily maintain a six-foot distance from other individuals. Cops say that Sims was upset upon spotting Turner going the wrong way in an aisle. During an ensuing argument, Sims allegedly struck Turner “about his body, head, and face.” Turner responded by shoving Sims away. Sims and Turner were each arrested for battery, a misdemeanor, and booked into the Pinellas County jail. They were both released from custody after posting $500 bond. (https://bit.ly/3fjKeuW)
FAKE NEWS.... OR FLORIDA?!
I read a headline, you guess if the story is something that really happened in the great state of FLORIDA or is it #FakeNews made up to trick you and amuse me
A Miami pet store owner found his shop door had been left open all weekend, Monday morning all his fish eaten by neighborhood cats. - FAKE NEWS
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Pastor Gets Ice Cream Truck To Celebrate Birthday, Hands Out Hundreds Of Free Treats